Posts Tagged ‘mental illness’

I spent part of my 21st birthday in the bathroom crying. We were all out at a bar. I don’t remember why, but I remember that my ex-boyfriend made me cry. I had some sort of terribly deluded idea that I was going to be friends with him, that you can drift from fucking to […]

One the things I find most challenging about sex work is the marketing thing. I’ve been on the job market before and did the whole resume writing workshop circuit. I understand that finding any job is about marketing yourself correctly. In sex work, it’s kind of challenging for me. Most of the sex work I’ve […]

I’ve been grappling with this a lot lately. On one hand, those most involved in sex workers’ rights are those with more privilege (economically, educationally, racially), while on the other hand, privilege is used to discount their arguments and experiences. I’m struggling to find a way that acknowledges my privilege without completely negating what I […]

I first read Susan Bordo when I was thinking about recovery, trying to make sense of my own experiences. Unbearable Weight put into words the seething rage I felt over my treatment at the hands of others. First, I developed a (biologically rooted) illness that was a manifestation of the expectations of my body, then […]

I have been dropping a lot of balls lately. I don’t mean to be. I feel awful about it. And yet I am struck by the salience of stigma in why I can’t explain to others why exactly I’m sucking at life right now. When I had surgery recently, it was totally cool for me […]

At the height of my illness (and the lowest weight), I would lie awake at night, watching the clock tick the minutes out. I would plant one hand on my chest and count the beats. Twenty-eight, twenty-nine, thirty. And wonder where it would end up. The number got progressively smaller. If I had a spry […]