Death and taxes.

24Mar09

One inspires the other.

I hate doing my taxes. I know there are all kinds of reasons for sex workers to not pay taxes or to not account for all of their income. But the IRS does not fuck around.

I advocate for doing them yourself, unless you have a really cool CPA. I’ve never been able to find one I can be honest with. What I do isn’t “technically” illegal, of course. But that’s just not something I want to deal with.

I’m making this my tax talk open thread. Post your questions and suggestions!

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3 Responses to “Death and taxes.”

  1. Well, a CPA may judge but the IRS could give a rat’s ass about the legality of your job. Did you make money? Yes? Give us our cut. Period. Hell, there are big time drug traffickers and gangsters who file taxes. Since I didn’t do sex work last year, the job I’m filing taxes on is as a personal assistant for my disabled mother. It is officially listed on my W-2 as *DOM WORK*. Those exact words.

    • I assume that’s short for “domestic work”? That’s funny. : )

      It’s all about keeping detailed, detailed records, to me.

  2. 3 quantumnleap

    It is a factual myth that the IRS does not care about illicit income, “so long as they get paid”. Many prostitutes have been arrested, charged, convicted and jailed for prostituton and not had their lives fucked by the IRS. And it had nothing to do with the IRS not being interested. It had only to do with poor communication and cooperation between agencies such as local police and the IRS.

    But as Deborah Jean Palfrey would tell you (if she were alive), if the IRS does happen to catch wind, and sniffs their nose in your direction, they will quickly seize your “ill-gotten-gains” (as they call them). The feds not only cleaned her clock for the prostitution, but the IRS seized her liquid assets as well as her two homes as ill gotten gains, being that she had no legitimate income. People think that being a licensed escort agency is some sort of protection. If law enforcement is making a prostitution case on you, that escort license does not protect you from asset seizure.

    The IRS is a double edged sword if they want to be. If you are an “under the radar” escort who pays no taxes, the IRS will soon audit you and wonder how you paid for the condo and the vacations to St Barts yet paid no taxes. They might even prosecute you simply for not paying the taxes. And they might not even look into the legality of how you earned the money. They’ll just follow the money and see that you had it and paid nothing for it. But if they learn about you in the context of first being an illegal enterprise, then you’ll get hacked by both edges of the blade.

    Palfrey’s case only demonstrates that the IRS focuses few of its resources on the “how the money was earned” equation, as they usually come to people with a tax bill rather than a criminal indictment. But the IRS has its own special agents, and they do indict people.

    And I could easily prove it. There is a local girl who is perhaps my area’s most popular and prolific sex worker. She’s a high six figure earner and has been for 6-7 years. She explains her income by being a cocktail waitress at a popular eatery 1-2 afternoons a week. All I have to do is fill out a form, send the IRS her name, phone number, escort website and place of employment, and her fragile house of cards will quickly fall. They’d seize all of her assets and prosecute her and the family members that help her for money laundering.

    Paying taxes just keeps the IRS from wanting to sniff your perfume. Pay no taxes and they’ll wonder where your perfume is. Pay taxes but send a strong odor of perfurm their way, and they’ll come investigate.


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