Oh no! The gays are getting hitched!


The California Supreme Court recently, in effect, legalized “same sex” marriage, much to the hand-wringing dismay of the New Right. (The same people, of course, who think I am damaged in the head and morally bankrupt, in case you wondered.) According to this ruling, discriminating against nonheterosexual couples getting married is akin to discriminating on the basis of race. Of course, the New Right points out to us that, ahem, at least multiethnic couples are man and wife. Well, may I remind you, my dear fundamentalists, that fifty years ago, science thought that people of ethnic minorities were genetically inferior? It kind of just goes to show you that with science, you can prove anything you want!

I’m serious. Statistics can make anything a fact. (Look at Dr. Melissa Farley’s work.) With a good enough study, I could prove that all cats are morally superior to most humans. Which I do believe is true. My cat has never threatened to beat me up because I’m queer.

What gets my goat is that the New Right cries that the queer “lifestyle” is destroying the family. We need to preserve traditional families, dagnabbit! May I kindly suggest that in the event of saving the traditional family, I ought to marry my first cousin, move in with my siblings and their spouses, my parents, and my grandparents? Hell, to be even more traditional, I’m going to go out west and join a polygamist cult because polygamy is far more traditional.

The New Right wants to save the modern family, the post-WWII family, the Leave It to Beaver mom-at-home, dad-the-breadwinner, two and a half kids family. This is a family that has never really existed for most people. This is a highly racist, classist, sexist family type. Working class women don’t really have the luxury of staying at home baking for Junior’s school bake sale.

I digress. My real point is this: sexuality is an incredibly fluid thing, not associated with any particular bodily manifestation. My real point is also this: society changes. Every generation thinks the next generation is dooming us all to hell and destruction. If two people loving each other opens the door to hell and destruction, that’s not a society of which I want to be part.


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